What year were you born?

1974

I looked it up, and it was a Tuesday. My grandmother was an April 1 baby. She was awesome. I’ve usually gotten along with other Aries women.

What was your life like growing up? What dreams and goals did you have for your life when you left High School?

I grew up in a small town in Pennsylvania and I wanted to be out of there so badly. I wanted, ferociously, to be older. I could go on and on with the various twists and turns as to where I saw myself but suffice it to say that I wanted to be happy, and to write. I lived in New York for a decade but I think I was always meant to be on the western side of the country. I’m so happy to be far away from where I grew up. I don’t understand people who don’t flee their hometown, even if it’s only for a little while. Ugh.

What is the one piece of advice would you give your younger self?

Don’t listen when they say, “You don’t really want to do that.”

Name at least one outstanding experience you have had in your life. How did this or these events affect you?

Finishing a marathon 15 minutes faster than I had ever expected or dreamed. I trained my ass off, sure, but it was also a really good day.

When in your life, so far, have you felt most confident and why?

I’d have to say: now. I am at a point where I really don’t give a fuck if people like me or not.

How have your dreams and goals changed now that you are 40+?

I still have the same dreams about writing, and being a famous well-respected writer of my own work (and not a client’s).

I do, however, feel like I don’t have time to waste and want to do more. I feel more like every day is precious and want to make the most of it, as trite as it sounds. I wish I were more productive but sometimes sitting on the couch and not doing much of anything also makes me happy.

I used to think that being married was the be all end all. Now I’m divorced. I’m in a relationship but I don’t know that I’ll ever be married again and I’m kind of ok with that.

How do other people to describe you or see you?

How I want other people to see me? Or how they actually see me?

Let’s start with the former: I want other people to see me as strong, smart, gorgeous, sexy, hireable, funny, and suffering no fools.

As for the latter: I’m not sure I want to know! It’d be like hearing your own voice and no one likes that.

Can you share what your favourite part of your body is? Why?

I would say I like my long torso! Like my stomach. It’s pretty flat and I like how clothes hang on it. I like my back, too. I also like my shoulders, because they show muscle easily.

Do you like being 40+?

Fuck, yeah.

How has your relationship with yourself changed as you have gotten older?

I’m not sure it has! I’m more like a 13-year-old boy than a 40 something woman.

What goals/ambitions/dreams would you like to be working on that you haven’t had the opportunity to start on yet?

More writing. More publishing. More good stuff like that. More independence. More adventures. Less anxiety.

What advice would you give your future self?

Do more shit. Love unabashedly. If you’re not getting what you want, leave.

*“Don’t give a fuck! Go out. Have fun. There will be a time when you look back and think that this was young!”*

How do you think women of your generation are perceived?

We aren’t. We’re Invisible.

Are there any myths you would like to bust about the over 40s? If so, can you tell us about them?

Nothing that hasn’t already been said. My grandmother was 98 when she died. She was a bad-ass who was teaching fitness classes well into her 90s and when she had to go into a home because she couldn’t live on her own anymore, she had to be moved because she was beating up her roommate. I don’t advocate violence, but… my grandmother was awesome so that roommate must have started it first or at least been hella annoying!

What advice do you have to offer to those who are approaching mid life or those that are in mid life and perhaps struggling with it.

Don’t give a fuck! Go out. Have fun. There will be a time when you look back and think that this was young!