What was your life like growing up? What dreams and goals did you have for your life when you left High School?

My childhood was a hard one. Not something I enjoy sharing.

What is the one piece of advice would you give your younger self?

Focus on school, avoid serious boyfriends.

Name at least one outstanding experience you have had in your life. How did this or these events affect you?

The most life altering thing I did was become a mother. I didn’t grow up dreaming of having a family, and it wasn’t until I met my husband that I could even fathom it. The moment I held my first born, a deep shift happened. I love being their mom. It’s not been easy, but it’s easily my favorite role in life. And somehow I didn’t lose myself in the process. Crazy because who knew this would be me?

When in your life, so far, have you felt most confident and why?

When I transitioned into a new career at 45 after staying home for 11 years with the kids. My job is very competitive, with no salaries or traditional pay, but I threw myself into it without any hesitation. And then fell in love. Before I knew it I was actually able to make a living doing something that I’m really good at.

How have your dreams and goals changed now that you are 40+?

I no longer feel like I need to compete with anyone else. I also realize success is fleeting. Whether it is work, financial, creatively, or relationships. Life is fluid. I just keep working at the things & people who bring me joy and trust things will all work out. I am comfortable with change and allowing goals to shift as the world around me shifts.

Have your core values changed over time? What do you value now?

Honestly, the only thing I value now is the health of those I love (as well as my own). It’s the most precious thing in the world.

Share an indulgence:

Really good pasta with really good wine.

How do other people to describe you or see you?

I honestly don’t know. They probably see me as far more confident than I feel on the inside. Sometimes I feel misunderstood or mistyped. For instance - I’ve been called high maintenance or boujee because I like nice things or tend to my appearance. But I came from a place of very little, so my appreciation of little luxuries stems from having nothing for much of my life.

The truth is, I don’t need anyTHING. It’s just window dressing.

When I had to pack up my house to prepare to evacuate during the fires, I only packed a few sweats & workout clothes, my photo albums, pictures of my kids & my computer.

So when I hear people comment on things like my appearance, it just saddens me. I’m not a stuffy person, I don’t belong in any one crowd, and I’m most comfortable with people who aren’t judgemental of others. Just because I might splurge on a nice pair of shoes doesn’t mean that is what feeds my soul. I love music, the water, books, knitting, dancing, traveling, getting swept up in a beautiful moment & locking that memory down, laughing my ass off until I cry. That’s who I am.

What is your super power?

I am hopeful & optimistic, and I always believe things will just work out if you give it time.

Can you share what your favourite part of your body is? Why?

My eyes, I guess they’re a different sort of blue, bright, and they never change - even if my body ages, my eyes stay the same.

Do you like being 40+?

Yes and No

I love the “I don’t give a shit what people think anymore” aspect of this age. If you don’t like me, fine. I’m not for everyone. I also know I’m incredibly capable & can do anything I set out to do. That’s awesome. I’ve failed & made endless mistakes in life & always get back up. When you get there, it’s a powerful feeling. It’s ok to fall, to fuck up, to have a bad patch if you know somewhere inside you is the ability to heal that and move forward again.

What I dislike is the physical aspect of aging. Do I enjoy my body degrading with time? No. Knee pain, back pain, reading glasses, mammograms, hysterectomy, it’s all bullshit. Like I said before, health is the most precious thing to me, and I’m at an age where I am seeing people too young to be sick, getting cancer, or having life changing injuries. That scares the shit out of me. I used to work out to keep my figure, now I work out so I can keep this one body healthy as long as I can.

I also miss my younger metabolism, and I hate how hard the struggle is with maintaining a healthy weight after 50 - especially when I love food & wine. Is that superficial? I suppose, but I’m being honest.

My biggest wish is to live a long, healthy life. No

How has your relationship with yourself changed as you have gotten older?

More introspective. I’m trying to slow my mind down and not react to the world as much as I used to.

Each year I get better at not taking everything that happens around me so personal, I’m finding a lot more peace. It is a bit lonelier - which is hard for an extrovert, but it’s much less stressful.

How do you think women of your generation are perceived?

Gen X is the lost generation. I would be surprised if anyone noticed us. We don’t fit in anywhere. We’re the children of parents who saw the sexual revolution, fight for equal rights, first generation of kids raised by working moms. We wear ALL the hats. We take it all on because that’s expected of us. We are the OG multitaskers & it’s exhausting.

Are there any myths you would like to bust about the over 40s? If so, can you tell us about them?

We’re not dead yet. We’re funnier now, sexier now, smarter now, even more dangerous- because we know these things. There’s nothing better than a smart, confident woman who knows what she wants.

What advice do you have to offer to those who are approaching mid life or those that are in mid life and perhaps struggling with it.

Floss your teeth. Go to all your doctors appointments. Stretch. Lift weights. Read. Put your health first.