Smart and joyous, Tanisha Doyle lights up the room she enters. She projects positivity in every story she tells. Doyle was born and raised in Portland, Oregon, the oldest of seven brothers and five sisters. Currently a single mom to three teenagers, Doyle had cared for her siblings as they were growing up as well as foster children. She imparts her wisdom to her boys and to us. “Continue to smile, shine and be yourself. I think that's very important.” Doyle wisely adds, “Never shrink yourself never under any circumstances.”
“I am tired of having the world against me and this I say for all Black women. As a single mother, as a Black woman, when can we as humans begin to embrace each other and support those of us who look different?”
Doyle works in Consulting and imparts a lot of insight and experience about being a Black woman in the workplace. Doyle notices within corporate America, people are expressing the desire for diversity right now, but she questions if they really are ready for people to show up as their true selves. Doyle knows that it's not just making space for diversity, but true incorporation that makes the real difference. Her questions and concerns are real, and poignant, Doyle: “Is there anyone for me to interact with? Is this environment nurturing an interacting space? Is it okay for me to be in this environment? Does this environment feel comfortable for me, for you and for all of us who are here, right now? That's incorporation and people often leave that out.”
Doyle confirms that she and most Black people previously had to change their behavior to accommodate those around them. And this is challenging to her as she advocates for individualism in the workplace and in her personal life. She explains the challenge in the workplace, “Society has also shown us, sometimes people don't want the whole person. It's this fine line between assimilation and alignment. Like do you want all of me or do you not want all of me?”
Through challenging times, she turns to a cherished frame she keeps near her side and brought to her photoshoot. This frame is with her on a daily basis whether at work or home. It holds pictures, inspirational quotes, sayings that are motivational to any current events or issues for Doyle. “Basically, it's me framing the moment. This is one of my favorites currently and it says “Plans really do come true.’”
Doyle’s teenage boys are her greatest joy. She is very close to her sons. Yet even in this glorious part of her life, the bubble gets broken frequently by the outside world.
“People ask me questions, like, oh is their father around or how many fathers are there?”
Highly inappropriate interactions such as these are all too common. An interesting dynamic Doyle talks about is that when her sons were younger, the reaction from strangers was always how cute they were, and all positive praise, and now that they are older and taller, the reaction to them has changed dramatically. Doyle shares a story about a family shopping excursion that someone turned it into a challenging moment.
“A lady comes up to me and says, ‘I bet that one gives you trouble.’” Without hesitation Doyle responded, “I said he's such a great big brother, he is responsible and sets great examples for his little brothers. He's just amazing.”
Her stepmom overheard the exchange and came right over to Doyle, appalled by what the stranger had said.
Doyle: “You can see that the switch is flipped. It is no longer look at those respectful young men helping their mother, now they're trouble in some people’s eyes.”
With her sons being older now, there is advice that she finds herself needing to give to her boys.
Doyle: “My son was going out to take a walk around the corner and we live in a area that is primarily white. He was like, ‘Okay mom, I’m going out on a walk.’ I make my sons get out of the house daily for physical activity. He had on a backpack and I said: ‘You have a backpack, what do you need it for?’ He said: ‘It's got my charger and stuff because my phone's not fully charged.’” Doyle said no, urging him to charge his phone completely and then go for his walk. She didn't want any added worries because someone would see him with a backpack on walking the neighborhood. “That is one example of the steps I have to take as a mother to try and avoid microaggression for my family.”
Doyle: “I am tired of having the world against me and this I say for all Black women. As a single mother, as a Black woman, when can we as humans begin to embrace each other and support those of us who look different?” Doyle adds.
Doyle feels many times people are either intimidated by her. “They judge my external appearance. It is absolutely exhausting to feel like every time you step out of your door you have the world against you, and that is what has to stop.”
Doyle’s roots in Black, Jamaican and Hispanic ancestry have given her a broad perspective on life, family and diversity. She feels this is a deep advantage to most people she interacts with. She has cultural awareness and an aptitude to understand and merge these differences into her own life and wishes the same for others. She finds wisdom in her heritage and hope for the future.
The momentum of the Black Lives Matter movement creates some introspection for Doyle. She shares, “I hope that this will be a time for re-evaluation for both our society and people individually.
“I hope that this will become a period of global alignment not just acceptance. ‘Alignment is much more powerful’.” Doyle feels that disrupting the social norm, is the doorway to future progress. Her hopeful wishes for the future and joyous nature are fully visible in Doyle’s whole being. I find it infectious, in her unwavering hope, I can feel my hope expand.
Interview & story by Jennifer Randall
Editing: Calico Rose & Shawnalee Anderton
Photographs: Shawnalee Anderton
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